a few day didn't post..haha...wasn't really busy and gt think of posting but still didn't...oso dunno why..haha...btw tmr is de start of 'o' lvl for me...and all my classmates.....hmmmmm.....
GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hope all will do well for tmr de paper....chemistry......
haha...can say very little people pass in my group...lols...hope all can pass ba...been doing alot of paper...really hope wun be disappointed althought started bit late......haha...
go study le..bye all...
good luck once again..
all jia you

yesterday was at de library for almost de whole day...woke up and play a while computer den sj say mt ask awnt go library ma..den jiu go le......
1plus go out 9pm reach home.......
was damn cold inside de library....they did alot but i didn't do alot starting headache den keep feeling unwell...can't concentrate....den stay too long le so cold....
after tat went to eat........haha..so tired...yawn......
oso sleep quite late...12plus ba...haha...was so tired but starting just can't sleep...den in de end read comice and my eye was closing.....so went to sleep...

tdy ws sat......though dun ahve to go b sch de...but den lionel tell me mr tay ask me go b...dunno real or nt..but go better ba...cause mr tay onli ask 7 people to go b......
den quite a lot go wor....morning sleep dao later den usual......
wake up jiu go play dota...den jiu go out le..........
de lesson was rather long....yeah concentrated...and learn quite a lot.........
but after lesson end headache........
den went jp with lionel....den he went home go find shang jie and mei tong....den went to buy xxl crispy chicken..........den jiu walk home le.....chat while walking home...and walk so far...accompany mt go take bus...cause dunno go home can do wat..oso dun want to anyhow think so stay with people better......haha
tdy haven't receive dao her message...think onli before she sleep will receive ba...dunno why but dis make me feel so terrible...haiz.....wat to do....haizz.........
sian...
bye

Tdy was de last day of sch...was lazy to go .....but still go...and was late ....by 3 min...lols......haha......den wan ting mistaken me as some1 else=.=...didn't reply her...wasn't in a mood b a...lols...just felt sian sian de...

den so little people come....4.5 de worse...haha...onli 1 boy....haha...
den first lesson is maths....mr lee take over our class.........hmmmm...quite funny de....lols....but onli 2 teach he teach i'm nt sure de.....haha.....but quite fun la....
every1 tats late he'll ask long or short distance runner....lol...long, o live very near...short, o u live very far....den miss ramash come in our class want him to ask...lols.........
den after tat is lit le......hmmmm..onli gt abt 14 pupils.......3boys onli le.....
den teach 1 hour jiu never teach le...ask dem go find teacher for help...den miss tan go through my mock paper....lols.................den jiu recesss le......
boring...stay in class do maths and chem........
den jiu shi chemistry le............
pass quite fast ba...and it started to rain...was cooling.....
den had mother tongue....so bored...liek do nth.......
after tat jiu went home le.........
tdy ....we didn't get near each other dao......haha......and nt a word to be heard...
felt so odd...............feel so low..........
haiz......
bye

tdy was 'o' lvl practical......so tired...first time first shift.....den need stay at ava for so long...haha......a bit cold inside...den stay too long headache le.......
wasn't very smooth.......
think made a lot of mistake...haiz...........too rush le...can't do slowly....
esciaplly chem rush so much...den ..haiz....hope can at least do as well as my preli de ba.....
after tat went to jp buy thing eat...den pei melvin wait bus jiu go home le......haha
went home dunno wat to do...haiz.....felt so tired...but didn't sleep....den play game ba.....
haha...tired tired....
haiz..tdy nth to say ba....nitez den.....
oso felt a bit bored..so..haha.....

First time posting pic wor....haha...
please click de photo for a larger view...
dunno why weird weird de...i noob ma..think so.........
dis is our class photo dis year....
INFORMAL












Dis is our formal class pic

talk abt yesterday first ba......yesterday didn't went to sch cause morning can't find my shirt and i going to be late le....so went b to sleep.....
whole day pass and i feel okay......at nite when my parent comes home......my mum say my shirt gt stolen...and den my father started to scold...den my mother scold b my father....they quarrel........
haiz...over me...over dis problem.....haiz.............
really hate my father.......i'm so scared of becoming like him.....like father like son..haiz....if i become like him and i hate him....wouldn't i be hating myself.....
hope i wun be like dis.....
in de end....called my friend to lend plants....johnson lend me.....haha..thks ar...
and who gt extra de can lend de lend leT_T...need return to johnson soon.....and i need cloths for my examT_T....dun want buy new de...haiz...left 2 weeks...
now its tdy.........my mood a bit low.........haha..haiz.....
tdy wake up at 6am den go johnson house......went to sch den still quite early...haiz.........so boring...........
den had cs.............need to change lab....den during cs i practice paper lo......
time pass quite fast de but very cold cause just under de air-con.....
den after cs jiu shi poa le......
starting at itr de but den cahgne to huminties room.........was like day-dreaming during poa........teacher concentrating on other i doing nth...oso dunno doing awt....
den when de lesson is abt to end teacher found out dat i do nth den jiu ask me de....den i started to do.......and den leson just end like dis...actually dun wanted te lesson to end...concentrated and its going to end..haiz.........
den is recess...dunno where basketball so diddn't play and stay in class do maths...oso ask clemeti send me songs....haha...........
after tat eng...was like chatting with lionel for de whole of 1hour and 30min...miss sandra keep calling me....Zzzzzzzzzzzz
but den receive a lot of paper and den lesson end le.......jiu go hall for colour award....so many people get....and some gt so much prize to take run here run there....lol...we laughing there...but we envy them....haha
btw i still haven't had any medal for my life.....haha....so useless rite..no achrivement.......
den after tat is de o lvl briefing......haha think of a lot of things before tat......
and tdy gt b our class photo......haiz..didn't ask people to sign...Zzzzzzzz
sian sian sian......
after de briefing actually is physic de go through practical...........but den gt de graduation nite de breifing ..sort of...so we had our physic remedial behind de hall quickly....haha.....thermal electrical,light........another 1 wat le?forget=.=...which 1 will come out le.....
hope tmr de physic practical can get de same as my preli de or even better...cause preli gt 13.....my cem i hope can get at least 12 ba...preli get 10.....
haha......
tdy felt so tired...head aching for whole day and my eye is so heavy nw......haha.....might fall sick soon but hope dun get sick tmr.......
get sick after tmr and recover before 'o' lvl..haha.....
bye

........hw to say tdy......fall asleep at 2plus..dunno doing wat oso..but just can't even though i'm tired.....sleep for 4-5hours ba.....yawn...tired...i tried to sleep somemore...but my mind can't rest.......
hw logn can i hold like dis....will fall sick ma......
tdy felt so bored......and she wake up quite early de ba.........earier than usual........
whole day felt so bored...went online tried to find people to chat but no 1 to chtat with.....haiz...
so sian so sian so sian so sian so sian....
whole day been bother with dis stupid feeling...haiz......
and no more message from her........sian........
haiz......haiz....
really nth much to say.....expect own all games tdy.....expect 1 ba......
headache...sian...wat to do.....tdy wat time sleep?haiz.......sian....
nite

tdy another borign day ba.........
went sch first period ss test...so little people
haiz...
den de essay i neo hw to do de....never c de word....problem!!!den no wonder find de question to be so weird......like nth to write...when i realise time up le..haiz....worse lit and ss i ahve even done..think will get f9 ba..never get before?...lols...everytime d or c de...
den after tat.....recess...jiu play basketball...lostr again...haiz..so long never win le...maybe its my mood ba..can't score...haiz..no feeling at all....
after tat jiu shi maths le...ramash..den so long do 2 graph question..at least nt so boring la.....haha....my gradient gt problem de...but think noe why le...lols.
after maths its cs....exam again..but dis 1 slack slack...gt discuss de...and i gt copy answer....den de alogorithm ask teacher explain so logn den understand..so hard...hmmmmmm
den oso never finish....after tat sch jiu realease.....we like get delay half an hour...awww never mind........at least i gt thing to do...
den.........my mood change le...haiz.........de feeling of my heart come again...so pain so pain...so terrible...haiz.......envy..haiz...why...haiz......
den after tat hoep to have poa...cause like dat jiu wun anyhow think le...but teacher say dun have...more sian...haiz.......den oso didn't play basketball...haiz...
maybe dis few day been using basketball to release stress dats why keep cannot goal ba...can't even feel de ball..haiz.......nt bad ba..every1 around me is happy...its better anw.........
its feel worse to c others being sad when u r happy ba?..so its better ba....
went home thought can play com to stop thinking can get rid of my feeling..hoping to find some1 tats onli can chat with me..who noes..i just on com my mum called and say my dad coming b....close de com...haiz......
wat to do ar wat to do....help help.....
den jiu go entertain myself..watch comice...den jiu do maths a few question...
den finally get to use com...
but still no 1 can chat with me
haiz...jiu play game lo..play tilll nw.....nt bad ba...tdy gt a friend come my house study with my sis...lol......i onli 1 playing.....
u say dunno when i can reply u with my no....i oso wish i could chat with u like before....always chatting..........but ...haiz..like u say ba...past is de past....wat can i do....nth...hw much i wish i can...hw mch i wish to ........haiz...
maybe its better for me nt to be able to message u..at least u wun get affected by me u'll be happy..and i wun ask u wat u doing..i can pretend to noe nth.....its better ba...but i really wish i could talk with u.....haiz..........
but.........
never mind
another day
and i still can't give up de feeling continue to strike me...hw many more day do i need...hw much time can i use.........why is dis happening......
its really hurts me a lot..............so much so much........
yeah forget to say...tdy gt a new phone to me ba...its a new phone to me but its nt brand new...its has de function i wanted...radio and mp3 player carmer...but no game at all?=.=
and de phone so ahrd to use
so weird....anw its better to have dis than de old 1........old phone have so much memory with her..i abit dun wish to change...but i have to start anew ba...maybe...haiz......wat sould i do...i really can't do it u noe ma....haiz.....
nite..

hmmm..tdy de lesson so boring....
whole day maths and eng onli....
awwww.my stomach aching...kaoz...dunno wats wrong...awwwww
tdy didn't do much....recess play basketball...haiz...no matter hw i shoot oso cannot goal...i can't efel de ball in myhand den play until so frustrated...haiz..dunno wat happen to me.....haiz.....deprove a lot and my stamine...dunno is never eat or wat...play a while jiu so tired...den oso slip...awwww
so.....
shoot so many ball no goal...damn sian diao.....
after sch jiu go jurong pt pon sch..actually want just go home de...but pei lionel..den pei until 2 hour=.=.......eat at jp oso...awwwwmy tummy....Zzzzzzzz
den reach home jiu keep play com...sian...play until so dulan...teammate so noob...haiz..i oso noob la...lol.....farm hao le opponent leave=.=owning le leave....den teammate keep feeding..den at nite start to lag...can't play properly...more sian...haiz.....
end of tdy ba....
.... . .. ....
haha....
haiz.
nite..

wooooo
forget to say sth...
i haven't been eating my breakfast and lunch for a few day le....
dis few day wun feel hungry de...nt even at nite but canoot dun eat dinner will get scolded.......but skip my breakfast and lunch...gt eat some snack la....but just wun feel hungry....
haha....dunno why...hoep i du nget weaker=.=.....iron man le...dun need eat de......haha....lame hor add on dis...but just dunno why wanted to say dis out and i forget=.=.....i become so forgetful....oso good ba..forgetful=forgiveful....(crap)....eh....spell wrong?.....lols...........
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
bye><

tdy plan to wake up early and study de but so tired....in de end sleep till very late again...yawn yawn....
reach home as usual de timing><.....do de same thing...den first period maths le.....
reach class sit down a while teacher come le...exam...paper 2....
actually dun have much confident de le....cause never practice.......
but while doing find it quite simple de....alot can do.....
haha den during poa check my score..wowo....gt 1 page 0 mark=.=but gt about 3 page full mark...de 0 mark de is i lazy to do..i neo do wrongly le...but dun want change..so tired.......den poa lesson oso enjoy ba..had fun while studying..haha><.......learn a bit of new thing ba..hope i can make it for my poa...wo......
jia you ba.....haha........
den after poa recess...plan to play baskebtall de.......but can't find de ball..at last find de ball but no 1 play with so didn't play study chem...haha.....
den after recess...sci test...waited in class for quite long no teacher come den say go hall...so jiu go hall lo........
den take de paper...2 paper together ...so hard...2hour 30min de use 2hour do finish but i use lesser=.=........hard....all anyhow de......
den break again......
i jiu go play basketball with gay..gay play halfway run away...den i continue play...den 2.10 le i go keep ball walk walk..heard mr yip voice...RUN Ar!!!!....lol....all ready le....Zzzzzzzzzzzz
den keep sweating>den do paper 1...quite easy do de....and i find chem hard but in de end chem and phy all get 13....total 26/40...=.=......can get above 30 jiu hao le ba...haha....
den after tat jiu went to jurong pt buy shinlin?....stupid name...
den oso buy bubble tea...and bought battery.....
den walk home le ......wait bus wtih lionel and mel..they saw a girl say chiobu(melvin)..den back so nice but infront okay okay><....cannot say people....awww
den while walking walk walk walk...i heard some1 call me=.=....gt our sch de people at playground i thought who jiu walk over c...gt a few people i look at all but never look at de 1 dat cal me...its wan ting..loL!!!......she say very sian.........
den chat with her a while ba..short while=.=...lol...den went home...
come home...haiz...my phone bill 100plusagain?...wth le...i used prepaid card le..while still...nth to say..den my sim card tio confiscated...can't message le..maybe better help me control if nt everyday distrib so many people...haha....
den i gt a new mouse..thanks to wen xiong....he give me de....haha...wireless de....wat i wanted^^.....but de mouse just a bit small...i nt use...and so sensitive...
i starting fix so long..starting dunno hw to open de battery 1...den buy wrong battery so went down to buy again...$2so expense..brought double A instead of triple A......den put inside...battery put wrong direction..put correct le still cannot..never tighten...grrrr!!!...use a mouse so trobulesome...or i too stupid...lol...thks xiong><
haha........den jiu try to play with my new mouse le...nt bad nt bad....but gt so many leaver spoilt my game....haiz...
end of de day le ba...wanted to pon sch tmr.......haiz....
tired.....tdy parent didn't go work also..thought cannot use com le..but they went out to play..haha...so...hehe......nite alll....

another day pass but i still can't give up on her........
tdy was actually quite a nice day ba...............
after sch we had chem remedial....was able to concentrate...i was just thinking i finally can concentrate acuse after cing my grades....lowerest few.......
den i saw her walking pass.....behind her was him...
my feeling at dat point of time....strike me.......my heart so pain.........but i can i do....i can't do anything...i dun even have de rites to feel like dis.....wat can i think........nth.......yeah nth come to my mind...but de feeling in my hearts......i can feel it with my whole day.....its aching........i could feel it for a long period...i started to lost concetration again......de smile on my face disappear again...
sorry lionel.........but my feeling at tat moment...it really can't be describ unless u feel it urself...
after chem was lit....yeah exam i dun have time to think of anything.....i concentrate on doing but i still du nahve enough tiem cause i went to class late as i was staring at de basketball court...watching de rain fall on de paddle of water on de court...i dunno why i like dat feeling....stare at it for a period....
den went to class find out gt exam...de paper so hard...i hate it and i'm been bother by other things....
while i was doing..she pass me.......i saw her alone....my hearts ease.......
but i still didn't complete de paper...i bet its de worse paper i have even done for my lit...
after de paper i went home............smsmed her.....and a few message from her she didn't reply le....my hearts pumping.....i feel tat they were tgt...i dun want to face de fact...but in de end there were still together and she went gome at 5plus...when i heard tat they were together ...i can't hold it....my tears drop again.........dis time nt a drop.....but wat can i do...i can't even be jealous...wat rites do i have......i can't even feel sad......i can't do anything.....
and i can't even be sad infront of u...i can't make u sad...........
i hope so much de 1 tat u love would be me...hope......
haiz........really find it so unfair........
but wat can i do............
nth..............
Sry

haha....
another day pas another day nearer to 'o'lvl and another day nearer to de end of sec sch life...and another day nearer of leaving u.....
nth much happens tdy...keeping myself at home...did nth.....
i feel so empty so empty without u.............
dis feeling in my heart is killing me....
although nth really has chaneg but dis feeling just come....just come naturally...
when dis feeling come i really dunno wat to do and i can't tell u....
is it my life without u..................
its........................
haha...........................
there was sth for me to do before dis but nw i feel like nth is for me....nth i can do....nth worth me doing......
but wat i do wasn't all for u but why i feel dat everything i do nw lost its purpose...........
am i just stubborn or stupid...........de onli words tat keep appearing in me is i need u........
my hearts so empty.....so empty without u.......
wat should i do.......
bye

Tdy wake up....feel so terrible......my heart feel so empty.........
i feel so sad.........dunno wat to say 2......but i been considering why she say those to me....i been thinking wat can i do....to fill de feeling i have in my heart......i can't think of anything.......i really can't let myself to hate u....u say all those to me..but i still dun hate u.......am i so deep in....
i forget hw i think le i forget everything............
i can't bring myself to ignore u..it should be de best way for me..but i can't do it...
i felt ignored by u..yeah its good but why do i feel sad inside me...its better for u to ignore me than me to ba...i really can't do it....its better for u to do it.....
i really dunno hw to feel...............
i noe ur heart is with some1 else but my love for u jus wun stop......
maybe wat i need is time..but hw am i going to live at dis moment...
hw much time do i need....hw much time can i spend......
i keep having some stupid thinking which i hate it myself....haha...i wonder why i think of dis..human nature?......
going to others people blog....i envy others..........why do i feel so lonely nw...
why my heart feel so empty?
its de first time ba...i felt so sad...my heart felt like dis...
i did cried for a few girls....bu i give them up soon....but why can't i do it dis time...hw deep am i in it...hw much do i love u.....
i feel like i gave all my life.......
hw i am going to get rid of dis.....i really dunno...
yeah i deserve it...dis is de result of wat i have done...
i go after some1 i like...is dis wrong ....no dis is nt...
but de way i go after is wrong...indeed ba....
in de end i get nth but lost more.......
i dun care hw others think abt me...i just go after u...cause i really wish to be with u...i noe i need u......maybe i was wrong...
i love u so wat...tat doesn't mean i have to be with u...isn't it....
yea i think so..dats a thought..but who dun wish to be with some1 they like?..
de time i have with u i really enjoy it so much..i really find it to be a blessing..
being just by ur side.......knowing tat u r around me...i felt so happy......but am i being selfsih...nt considering ur feeling...
i did a lot i try to..but still i didn't achrive it..i didn't let u fall for me...
i dun blame any1 but myself....
i dunno hw..i dun wish to forget u..but i feeling miserable....
hw should i pass dis......
i asked help from a lot of people.....yeah by talking to dem by hearing thier advice i felt so much better.....but de feeling is still there......when they go off when we stop talking....de feelings b....
wat should i do...i dunno wat i should od to keep myself from thinking..i can't think of anything..study study study...i can't even read a single word ba....
i'm nt like dis in de past?.....relationship is my deadly weakness ba.....
hw should i pass dis...during dis cirticle period....
wat should i do.......every1 so busy and i bothering every1....telling dem my problem...asking dem for elp.......haha...
SRY every1 and those dat gt into trouble becuase of me..
i really dunno wat hould i do......i can't continue writting dis forever and nt stopping ba...but once i stop i feel so.......
bye

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dis is wen zhong's blog stupid bleach fan....everything is bleach even de song and de pics are all bleach OMG!!!somemore onli gt byakuya de pic...and called himself byakuya><.......captain sia...wowo.........
haha
nt insult la...joking onli...
pretty well blog at least better than mine ba....full of words?....
full of emo things....
its much better compare to mine so do spend sometime visiting his blog
but think nw have some techinal problem can't c his post=.=....
lol...anw just tag him ba=.=......
ltr he blame me...
give me some face okay?
haha
thz....
oso take de chance to thks those dat i having been bothering to say abt my feeling de...thz every1........i am gald ur can help me><
siew teng must thank u a lot of.......haha.....
vivian...sry....i hope i didn't get u into trouble...thz anw..althought u didn't tell me but at least its a hint ba?..............SRY!!!i change le wor? think u also find me a bit weird le ba?haha.............sry wor....will try my best to become de old me de....
will try my best to overcome de....
i forget wat i used to be le?...
any1 give me so comments...lol

tdy was another miserable day?...
yaeh feel rather sad........
feel betrey? no nt anymore.....when i first find out i really felt betray.....
really sad....i trusted u instead of her and de result is like dis...
am i trusting u thing tat i nt suspose to trust and doubt u for things i should't have doubt?........
really dunno....gave u my trust.........but wat i c really hurt me....wat i hear from u........
tdy thz to jonathan for speaking to me...i feel refresh i gt de feeling b..i'm me again..but its just for a while a short for?...de recess?
and whe n isaw de messages i;m totally hurt...betray....betrayed....haha...
sound so wat....but i really am....
tdy they went to de same place...
i dunno wat there have?...is it really so great ....haiz....maybe ba....
am i really wrong to go after wat i want?
i really dun wish to think like dis..but wats making me think like dis...i'm nt unreasonable....i believe i am....
but why did i appear to be....i really dunno wat u do...i really dun...
i just wanted to noe...but it always makes me unreasonable...maybe i care too much?.....isn't it...why do i care so much.....
why???
haiz...
i didn't object them to be tgt...i'm happy for dem...but i'm sad for myself....i really can't do it......just by cing ur so happy?i'll just feel happy like dis...i really can't....i'm gald u r happy?.....but i really can't be happy for myself?....
why r u hiding it from me...why can't u just tell me...yeah i'm sad...but its better than to have u been sad...........wats my sad for?.......
why do u have to sacrific urself?...i dun need tat...it hurts me more to c u being sad.....but why i just can't let u go...
i noe its better to let go but why can't i....i really can't i really..am i so deep in love?.....
theres too much thing i dunno....i hope i could noe everything.......
yeah i did i found out things dats is being hidden from me again....
i really feel so sad...but i'm gald i noe the truth...its better for u to be happy ba...
nw maybe i could just leave u...u dun need my care anymore..u dun need me as ur friend....u dun need some1 tat makes u angry....i nt de old me...tat me is dead......its better ba..i'll feel better to c u happy 2.......
dunno whether u have been reading ma...i doubt so...
my hearts been giving dis feeling..i hate dis feeling..i hope i could just dig it out.....stop it....
i plan to write out our story and it include my thinking for eveything u do every moment......
but nws o....do i have de time...
i onli can think of dis way to let u noe hw i really feel........why am i doing dis...
i can't blame u ba...its me who get dis starting....
haiz
no rites to blame u...its better to blame myself ba...ah remember something i just told some1 2 nite ago? its feel better to blame other than urself.....
but i choose de harder way?....
why can't i just hate u and give up on u..consider de things that u have done...why can't i give up on u...why do i still have feelings for u...
why does it seem to be tat i'm bothering u nw...
wat r we nw.....wat r we in de past......if i can choose again i wun regret to fall for u again...
but i'll change hw i love u wat should i do wat i shouldn't in order nt to hurt u....
why u can't undertsnad my heart...my mouth can't express my heart.....
i'm nt good with it......................SRy

dis few day been feeling moody..........
tdy tears drop twice for my thinking ba....but just feel so sad and my tear can't be hold back.......
dis few day really understand a lot of thing ba......wat i get nw is all because of wat i do ba.....i deserve it...i deserve to be sad i deserve to feel so hurt....
dis few day really i c a lot and understand a lot...its really like i'm anyhow thinking......actually i really find dis world unfair......
but is dis world really unfair i dun really noe ba......
tdy actually dun plan to go cs de.....but den teacher saw us and ask lionel to go.....i was feeling damn sian and unhappy ba.......den i feel so weird..i choose to go b to cs.....and they went to hein house...i been thinking and thinking.......
and den finally my tears drop when i went out.......i hit de wall once......and de pain mark remain there till nw....
when de punch falls i dun fall anyhting i feel i didn't hit hard enough for me to feel pain but when a few hours past my bone aches....
i really think i deserve all dis but why i can't take it...maybe i should just take it ba....and like dis i'll feel better.......but i just can't give her up......
maybe for all these to happen let me realise tat i really love her a lot..i dunno hw important is she tat i'm so afriad to lost her...and dis feeling is driving me crazy..
can onli say wo zhen de hao ai ni
it has been so long since i didn't send her home le or should say we r alone ba...we oso didn't chat for so long........
tdy i get de chance to send her home..actually its just a short distance but i wanted to send her furture......but still it seems so short...we reach just like me blinking m eye once..
and its time to say goodbye......everytime i watched her walk away.......de feeling i get was always so sad....always feel like tmr wun be like dis..i dun wish to end ..
but still always goodbye comes so fast......
tdy saw her hand gt a plaster i was so shock......i was so worry?....tat's just a small wound?......but i was so worried...and i over worry and over concern?....
i really change le ma?.....i really change le ma....
i really wondering........
am i like dis or am i nt.....
if dis is me i really hate myself
everytime i compair myself with him i dun find any good pts of myself...wat i gt?..wat i deserve to let her love me?....i gt nth.......
i even lost hope in myself........
am i being selfish...i really dun bear to let her go...i really like her
why can't we be tgt.......all my fault ba........
haiz......wat can i do...i really dunno...i onli wish we could be tgt..
when u r beside me i feel so happy..de feeling is so hard to describ...
haiz...........
bye

wat should i say le............
i just feel like posting ba.......
maybe should say my feeling nw ba...........
i'm very sad nw....can say totally break down....tears comes and goes and comes and goes....
i dunno hw much time i need hw long i need..........
but hw much time and i left with....
hw much more time can i waste le.........
my hearts really pain..
dats de onli feeling i gt ....i can feel it strongly feeling digging it out...
haiz............'
who can help me...i feel so helpless......
i dunno wat should i do......it might be better but i dunno hw to accept it.....
i wish some1 can scold me..some1 can wake me up from dis.....
some1 can help me forget dis...
some1 tat can stop my pain........
my posts have all been unhappy things.......
a blog is to keep ur memories why did i choose to keep de sad memeories.....
.................................................................................................................................
dun think too much ba...i think its de onli thing i can say to myself.....over le thing is over le i can't do anything le....some1 feeling is nt control by u ba...maybe its really fate just have to admit it ba......loving some1 too much really hurts a lot......i didn't get hurt so much before ba......
dun regret for ai shan ni but i regret for de things dat i do ba.......
i'm lost........who can tell me wat to do.........
inside me onli gt some1 can help me ba............
waiting for it......if even she can't i dunno who can le...maybe dat time must depend on myself le ba.....can't always depend on others....
i really feel so lost.......
de day tat i dunno wat to do hw to continue my life...i lost de target to live for?.....maybe......dis day.....de feeling dat i get from my heart..tat feeling dat i never get before....i wun forget ba.....i wun ba i wun ba....
i gt to be strong.....even if i can't i have to tell myself to be strong.....
can i really give her up?.......
or should i say do i really want to give her up....
i really dun want...so i dun think i can...........
bye.....

today i pon sch cause wanted to rest><...oso dun wnt go sch la...been having headache for a few days le..so sian...den go do everyday till so late....everday during remedial jiu headache....so tdy decided to take a break sleep longer...haha...
tdy morning wake up....hmmmmm den jiu receive a message....den affected my mood.....feel rather sad........why do i live here...i never dislike where i live till nw ba....haha.....why i live here jiu can'ts send her...haiz....i just sick of dis.....
i dun mind being tired i dun mind its troublesome i dun mind wasting somemore time...i dun mind walking so far....but u mind.......
tdy make u sad again....in fact i dun really noe hw .......
maybe is de word i use or wat thing i do.....
u say u do wat oso make me unhappy....nope..........its nt wat u do ba......
haiz...i really dun want make u sad..u told me u cry...i dunno hw to feel...i really dunno wat i do...i just told u i'm sad..........
think ur impression of me haven't change ba.....cause whenever i am upset ur thinking is i like dat again i like dis again...i really can't change le ma...i trying very hard le.......i oso find my thinking stupid u noe i hate tat thinking i even hate myself....
i wish i wish i wish i wish u would be happy everyday.......i trying my best nt to make u sad or angry le..but why .........wat i did.....haiz.....i can forget everything just to make u happy...i really can't afford to c u being unhappy......
i sometime really thinking it might be better for me nt to speak or message u...cause i always make u angry......
haiz...i really dunno wat to say...but i onli wish tat u can be happy....
now i'll talk abt yesterday ba........
yesterday was another sad day for me?.....guess so...my day seems to always be sad ba......haha
yesterday when i reach home i looked into de mirror...i saw red eyes...haiz
while i was walking home yesterday i can't hold back my tear...i keep trying to hold it back but it keep rushing out.....i droped a few drops of tears...
ahhh...
suddenly dun feel like saying wat happen.....never i c dis i jiu will remember le ba..
hmmmmmmmmmmmm
impression.....
when u have a good impression on some1 for de first sight and den it changes....
is it really tat hard to believe tat he is going to change to be good because of u...
wat i'm facing de answer is no........i really hate it ...it make me feel like giving up......cause even tat person dun trust me......but iw un ba...its better....
SRY
aiz...didn't really noe wat to say le...haha....hmmmm
so long didn't talk abt happy de thing le...hmmmmm
awww...feel so odd.......dunno wat happen to my head oso think too much le ar?.
lol....haha...
de mock paper tat we do yesterday, i did pretty well ba...at least better than before=.=gt 37%over 50....lol...
last time fall ...last last time should be abt 40....
hope can make it in time to get my target mark for maths when it is o ba....jiayou...haha....stop le ba...dunno wat to say...
long ba....lol

your profile here.
My name is: Wang Cheng,born at china27nov1990
likes to play basketball and chi-chat around and playing computer games.
Currently studying in ngee ann polytechines under school of enginnering(Electronic&Computer Enginnering)

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